Chirstmas Jokes‏

ONIONS AND CHRISTMAS TREES: 

  A family is at the dinner table.The son asks his 
 father, 'Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there? The 
father, surprised, answers, 'Well, son, there are 
three kinds of breasts. In her 20s, a woman's breasts 
are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s to 40s, 
they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. 
After 50, they are like onions'. 

'Onions?' 

 'Yes, you see them and they make you cry.' 

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter 
said, 'Mum, how many kinds of 'willies' are there?' 
The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, 'Well dear, 
a man goes through three phases. In his 20s, his willy 
is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 
40s, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. 
After his 50s, it is like a Christmas tree'. 

 'A Christmas tree?' 

 'Yes - dead from the root up and the balls are just 
for decoration.'